Crappers of Crumlin

 

This one is also Johnny's. Also given to him by my mom. It is Belleek -- as in the Irish porcelain -- from their "Doors of Dublin" series. Johnny likes it, because it reminds him of the big old Georgian houses that he used to paint back home.

Notice I said "used to paint," not "used to live in." His own front door doesn't look like this. Not at all. His house isn't so much Georgian as it is Corporation. Which -- if I'm understanding it correctly -- is sort of like a government-sponsored, low-income, rent-to-own program. Even if I've got that slightly wrong, I think it's safe to say they weren't building Corporation houses in the Georgian mold.

They weren't building them quite this slummy back then, either, though. So at least that's something.

Anyway, here's what Johnny's front door really looks like:

Or used to. This isn't his house really -- and his isn't on the end like this one, either; his in the middle of the row -- but otherwise, it's the exact same house. Same door, same windows, same front gate, same layout, everything. Or, like I say, used to be. I'm told the door and windows have both been replaced, a notion that makes Johnny really sad. Which is why he so vehemently preserves the loo in the back garden with the genuine and original chain-pull cistern.

Oooh, what are the chances of Belleek making a series out of that?