It's not about the house.

Wednesday, January 2, 2008

I Broke My Chair!

My office chair. The other day I just sat on it and it up and broke. It's still functional -- that is, I can still park my butt in it and type and everything -- but it sinks and wobbles in a way it never did before and it's definitely not supposed to do. The chair was last year's Christmas present from Johnny, so at least it lasted twelve whole months before succumbing to my super power.

This year, in my stocking, he gave me a bunch of shower stuff. Scrubbies and soaps and accoutrements like that. The shower he finally caulked is holding up just fine, by the way -- which may, now that I think about it, be why he selected that category of stocking-stuffer -- but one of the scrubbies broke the second time I used it.

Those onion-bag-like things that are scrunched up in a little ball and you're supposed to wash your body with them? I've never had one of my own before, I always just used plain old soap, but I kind of liked it. It made lots and lots of bubbles! And then, when I lathered up the next day, it just came unraveled in my hand. I was left holding a twelve-foot-long, sudsy plastic sock. I don't know that a twelve-foot sock might have some sort of useful purpose, somewhere, but it's not the most practical tool for washing bodies with.

I really should never be allowed to lay hands on anything.

Seriously, I broke a scrubbie?


Leslie said...

Well, I have to say that it is bordering on pathetic that you could actually break a scrubbie... On the other hand, some of them are pretty crappily made, and if that one little band in the middle isn't secure you're left with, as you said, a long mesh sock. So we can chalk this one up to shoddy merchandise. Go get another one (they're cheap). They really are quite nice to have. And maybe you won't break this one. said...

Dude, don't impale your ass on a broken chair.

Robert said...

Sorry for this off-topic comment, but it has to go somewhere. The contest prizes arrived today and exceeded my expectations. Of course, my expectations were a Tom Brady Action Figure or a Patriots bumper sticker. I enjoyed it all, but the spider from the AssVac was just TOO much. (Your readers will no doubt mistakenly assume that the last sentence is a joke.) It was a fun, thoughtful package and the entertaining note that came with felt like my own personal blog post. When's the next contest?

su said...

Wahoo Robert

theotherbear said...

I am strangely suspicious that you live in my house, as my computer chair has started wobbling dangerously, I found a broken scrubbie in the bathroom yesterday that sounds JUST the same as yours, and I live in a renovators delight that drives us mental.

EGE said...

Leslie -- I do think you're right, I think it was a cheap-ass scrubby. He gave me two, so if it happens again I'm blaming the merchandise.

ILU -- I wo-- OW!

Robert -- See, everyone? This is how to write a timely thank-you. (FYI: Robert also emailed me -- thereby double-ensuring that the next contest wouldn't be ragging all over HIM.) You're welcome!

theotherbear -- welcome to the Destructo/AssVac club! I am officially the only member, but you are hereby honorarily inducted.