Pink Spit?

You know what's not a good idea?

Eating a contant stream of raspberry-flavored hard candies in an attempt to keep yourself awake to watch the new Top Chef. The re-broadcast at 11:00, not the original one at 10:00. Jeez, you're not that old.

You know why this is not a good idea?

#1. It doesn't work, and you probably could have died because for all you know you fell asleep with a raspberry-flavored hard candy in your mouth, just waiting for a chance to choke you.

#2. Which of course means you fell asleep without brushing your teeth, and after the six months of dental hell you've just been through, you really should know better than to eat raspberry-flavored hard candy before bed and then not brush your teeth!

#3. But when you do brush them the morning, you will give yourself a turn. Because raspberry-flavored hard candy makes for some pink-ass spit.


I'm going to be VERY busy for the next few days. Johnny's birthday is this weekend (sh, don't tell him I told you -- I'll remind you again on the actual day), and there's a new baby being born almost as I type this (not to me; if it were me, there would be pictures. Also: flying pigs!). We're crossing the state to welcome her to Planet Earth on Friday, and we have the family coming over for St. Patrick's on Saturday. Plus there's that whole only-mop-the-floor-once-a-month issue looming over my head. Some family parts (including Football Buddy) are spending Saturday night, and then on Sunday, after making him cook us corned-beef hash for breakfast, I'm dumping Johnny at the airport and meeting Baby-Daddy for a Say-Goodbye-to-Planet-Earth, congratulatory drink.

Phew!

I don't know what all of that will mean for this space here. I may go dark, or I may run in after accomplishing each task and give y'all a one-sentence update about how my ass has gone south for the winter and so I'm doing that thing with my hand while I wait for it to migrate north again.

Probably the latter, so stay tuned!