This Can't Keep Happening

Something else has been brought to my attention about which I was definitely wro-- I was wr-- I may have been mistaken.

But first:

LadyCiani got her toys! The ones I sent as her prize for naming the pig-rat -- which at the time was confirmedly just a rat, but has since taken on a bi-special identity (don't judge: we've all been through our freaky phases, have we not?).

These toys that I sent are great toys. I love these toys so much, in fact, that I thought about keeping them for myself. I seriously considered never sending them, saying I did, and blaming their failure to arrive on the U.S. Postal Service. But then I remembered about integrity and everything, and also the manner in which Postal workers tend to react to slights real or imagined.

So I stomped down to the P.O. and I mailed them, being very careful to smile nicely at all the postal Postal workers while I did it. But I took some pictures first. And now that LadyCiani has her toys safely in hand, I won't be ruining any surprises for her if I decide to show you.

So look!






And then, out of the goodness of my heart, I threw in a pig-rat, so she could have a Biscuit of her very own:

And you know what she did? She read the label. And you know what she found out?

Jeez. Imagine doing a thing like that. Reading the label to find out what something is.

I tell you, I have some of the smartest readers in the world.


And do you know what else LadyCiani did to her Biscuit? She ate it. She says it tastes like almonds. Which is odd, because Johnny said plums. But maybe they're not all the same. Or else maybe Johnny was drunk when he ate it. Or LadyCiani was.

Sober or no, however, I wonder if she checked for a date on that magic label before she ate the pig-rat (oh yes I am still going to be calling it a pig-rat, no matter what the label says). Because I still couldn't imagine why they'd be selling pigs at the Ratty New Year, so I checked -- and apparently last year was the year of the pig.

And, um, them biscuits were not refrigerated in the store...