It's not about the house.

Friday, February 15, 2008

Little Rabbit Fo Fo

I'm better! Sometime in the night my crud crept away as stealthily as it crept in on Tuesday. I can breathe and talk and sleep and eat and everything, just like a real boy! So I'm ready to pick up again at last where I left off, which was --

Oh, but wait.

Some of you might be wondering how it went with Dr. Canadian Dentist yesterday. If you are not one of those sickos, then feel free to just skip down to the pictures, but if you are: my twenty-minute appointment took three foing hours (yes, that was supposed to say "f-ing," but I like the typo so I left it; I might just keep it for a while. So foing what?).

Not three hours of actual dental work, but three foing hours of waiting for the lab to open, then polishing the crown, then oops it's too high, then oops we ground it down too far, then the guy in the lab is in a meeting so he can't build it up again, then he did but it's too high again, then oops we ground it down too far again... and finally me saying "I don't care if there's a little bit of metal showing, I want to go foing home!"

So now this crown -- this crown, in the pursuit of which I have suffered for six straight months. This crown, which has now cost, including the surgery and re-treat root canal complete with perf and gattapercha (remember the perf and gattapercha?), somewhere in the neighborhood of $1600. This crown, for a tooth that broke on opening day and that a team of so-called experts could not bring home by Super Sunday. This crown?

Has a black dot in the middle that looks exactly, but exactly, like a giant, rotten, stinking dental cary. (That's "cavity," for those of you who aren't down with the gattapercha.)


Anyhoo, so back to the cabinets...

I was going to take individual pictures of all my plates so as to prove once and for all who won the contest and wax poetic about them, but the battery on my camera died this morning (fo!). So you'll have to settle for these shots I took a few days ago and up till now had decided not to run. On my way home from work I'll pick up a new battery, and I'll wrap up that other thing this afternoon. Really, this time.

Okay, let's see, what first? Oh! These were a gift from my sister:

Plastic beer mugs. Or water, I suppose. Juice, iced-coffee, Kahlua sombrero -- put whatever you like inside them, the important factor is: even Destructo can't get them to break! Seriously, I think she gave them to me in 1999. There were a dozen then. Now there are eleven left! That's some kind of kitchen-miracle right there. Plus, I bet if I looked I'd find the other one, probably under the bed where Andy sleeps when friends like us don't let friends like him drive home.

These, however, are only still in one piece because they are never-used:

Hurricane glasses from Pat O'Brien's in New Orleans. Except we didn't even get them there. I got them at the Jewish thrift store on Comm. Ave in Allston. I don't know what it's called, or whether it's still there any longer. This was in like 1997, after all. Hey, congrats, Destructo!

Preservation tip #1: never, never, never use things.

This is definitely a Christmas mug; Currier & Ives & all that jazz:

But apparently every other mug in the entire universe makes Irish tea taste like gobshite. God help Destructo the day she gets her hands on this one. (Actually, she already did, a little bit. See that chip out of the bottom? But it foiled her. Curses!)

These (which, yes, used to be four) are getting packed away because they break my heart :



And this? This, I believe, is my oldest possession (if you don't count things I got in the hospital when I was born):

I got it when I was eight or something, because I had a bunch of rabbits which I showed in 4-H fairs. (I was cool when I was little. You are jealous.)

I don't know how old I was when I broke the handle off (my superpowers emerged at a very early age) but I was about fourteen when I noticed what all those cute little cartoon bunnies were doing on my mug:



Leslie said...

Hee. My poor alzheimer's-addled Granny's absolute favorite mugs at my mom's house has for many years (including pre-dementia) been the one with the "cute little penguins all over it." The cute little penguins that are making like bunnies. My mom, evil thing that she is, loves to give my Granny her coffee out of that mug while church folks are visiting. said...


Holy crap. You are so driving your ass to my upstate dentist next time you have a problem.

su said...

Wow pretty spartan. Ma'am Paper or plastic?

EGE said...

Leslie -- That's evil!

ILU -- It was $725 for the re-treat root canal and $425 for the crown-lengthening periodontal surgery. Technically, the crown itself only cost $450, but I added it all up for emphasis's sake. Plus because who cares how it breaks down, it still adds up to $1600!

Su -- These aren't everything I own, just the only things marginally interesting enough to show. I have LOTS of boring crap.

Amalie said...

Best mug in the whole world-- and I was in 4-H, too. (Everybody's always jealous-- just don't pay any mind)

Also, I have many, many crowns-- one tooth has had 3 root canals by itself!

In short, this post and I have bonded.

LadyCiani said...

Hi from a lurker.

That bunny mug is too much! I must send that to my husband. His parents have a mug with pictures of elephants doing it.

He has a story about how his dad went to a bar and got drunk (completely out of character for him). When Dad came home, he was plastered, but completely pleased with himself about the present he brought his wife to make up for being out so late and coming home drunk - the mug.

They still have it. It has to be 15 or 20 years old. I can't bring myself to use the mug when I visit. I'm too chicken.

su said...

I have the embarassing 60s N.O.W. Poster but everyone in the family wants me to leave it to them in the will!

EGE said...

Amalie -- Maybe I should have paid closer attention to the "pledging my head to clearer thinking" part, eh? (And if you don't remember the pledge, then I am cooler and YOU are jealous of ME! Ha ha!)

Ladyciani -- Welcome! Lurking is fine but commenting is even finer. Someday, if you're good, I'll tell you MY "Dad got drunk" story. But it doesn't involve foing elephants. Just Pabst Blue Ribbon. Which is kind of the same thing.

Su -- Someday, if you're really good, I'll tell that story too!

Amalie said...

My heart to greater loyalty? No jealousy here, I'm afraid.

Wow. I am a bit sad. That was my first reaction...

Robert said...

The titles of your blog posts are the best, but shouldn't this one have been "Little Bunny Fo Fo"?

EGE said...

Yes. Duh.

So now it is!

EGE said...

Sorry, I had to change it. We didn't sing the song that way, and it just seemed wrong.

PS Amelie -- my hands to larger service...

theotherbear said...

Fabulous mug. I am sure whoever bought it for you also didn't notice the rabbits were foing!

braveheart said...

Oh Leslie, you have me foing falling off my chair. The guys in the white coats are going to checking to see why I am screaming with laughter. Your mom must be a HOOT!