It's not about the house.

Friday, February 1, 2008

Picture Pages! Part 3: Stove (and cabinets and counter and drawer-handles)


It works and everything!

You may notice, however, that the range top is no longer flush to the counter, as Johnny and Andy spent three hours with shims and levels making sure it was.

That's because, six months after we installed it, the ignition broke. One by one the burners simply failed to light. Clickclickclickclick... clickclick... clickclick... nuthin.

I didn't call the manufacturer until the last one went. I was fishing for a match just like they did in the olden days (i.e., me, when we lived in our last apartment), and I thought: "Hey, wait a second -- I have a warranty! And I know where it is and everything!"

So I called, and Maytag sent their repairman over (I may have said in an earlier post that the stove is Whirlpool, but if I did then I was wr... I was wr... Well, anyway, it's Maytag).

Turns out the Maytag repairman isn't really the Big Guy from WKRP like in the old commercials. He's really a little guy, and he's Korean. He's good, though. He had the problem fixed toot sweet (or however you spell it) and when he was done, he said:

"You really ought to raise that up and level it. That's dangerous!"

I kept my cool, though. It wasn't his fault he had to pull it out to fix it, and it wasn't like I'd warned him about the shims. He pushed it straight back in, because that's how it's supposed to work, and when he did he fouled up the whole three-hour system.

But it wasn't his fault. So all I said was, "I know." Because I didn't want him to think I didn't know. And then I couldn't help but add: "It was level, before. We'll get it back that way later."

"No it wasn't." He said. "Now sign here."

That lying Maytag bastard!

Why do you have to be like that, Maytag Repairman? Are you honestly that lonely, sitting around waiting for a call, that you don't know how to act when you get in company? That stove was freaking level. Dead level. And it's not your fault that it isn't, now. I don't expect you to stick around for three hours and make it right again. So why you gotta get all up in my grill?

What I said, however, was "Oh." And I signed the papers.

Then, just to show him, we never did level it off. Ha ha.

No, really, the logic was as follows: it took an entire afternoon to level it the first time. And who knows, we might have to pull it out again when the exhaust fan or cabinets go in on top. So why bother to spend another afternoon making it right? Just leave it till we get around to finishing the second half of the kitchen, and we are really-truly done, done, done, done, done.


Apropos of nothing: in that top picture, you can see the counter and the cabinets and the four-dollar drawer-handles I picked. I've nothing more to add on any of those.

Oh, but Johnny says "Nuh-uh. We can so open the oven drawer!"

So that's where the broiling pan's been hiding all these years! What do you know? I guess I was wr... I was wr... Well anyway that's as far as it will open, and that can't possibly be as far as it's supposed to go.

So I think I was still half-right, after all.


Sparkle Plenty said...

That's a great-lookin' stove (Maytag guy=yet another frustrated former elementary school hall monitor) and I'm diggin' the drawer pulls. What have we here? Brushed nickel?

Vanessa said...

Hug that stove for me, its gorgeous!

EGE said...

Sparkle -- Dang, I should've given him a wedgie when he was on his hands and knees! Those drawer pulls are definitely brushed something. Probably nickel, you're probably right. I'll show a closer-upper of them later.

Vanessa -- I tried, but it bit me.