It's not about the house.

Friday, June 15, 2007

Day 16, Project Five: Hah!

I hung the laundry room door!

First of all, I noticed at some point since I got home that the button has fallen off my jeans, and I don’t know when it happened so I don’t know where I might have been today with my pants all hanging open. Which has nothing to do with anything, I'm just saying: this is my life.

Then Johnny got home and he said the closet door that I've been working on is, too, lighter than it was when it started, and that the bleach is working exactly like he thought it would. (Not like he said it would, though. If I'm not mistaken he said something along the lines of "Spit spot, just like new!") Then he squirted it again (and didn’t rag it off, I might add) and told me I’d have to do it a few more times and then let it dry for three days before I could even think about staining.

But instead of turning inside out and showing him my spleen, I hung the door on the laundry room. I don't know, I must be getting sick or something.

The plan was to wait and stain it first while I had the stain out for the other one, but plan-schman, I couldn’t wait another week. It’ll come down easy enough to stain when I’m ready. And in the meantime -- look!



The bad news (well of course there’s bad news) is this: they sat in the packaging for so long (what day is this? June 15th? okay, so that makes it three years) that they’ve faded in patterns around the cardboard inserts. Actually, not faded, but rather gotten darker. See that light rectangle up at the top? They’re darker where the inserts weren’t and lighter where they were. Go figure. But if Johnny tells me to bleach them I’m gonna punch him in the head.

The other bad news (and of course there’s other bad news) is that there wasn’t room for the springy thingy that goes at the end to save you from having to worry about pulling the door off the track every time you fold it closed. When I put the springy thingy on the end, I couldn’t shut the door. So now I have to worry about it every time I do. That’s okay, though, I’m good at worrying. Lots of practice. And I saved the springy-thingy (for now, anyway, it’s in my bedside table with all the other random parts left over from other things I’ve put together) -- so if anybody has any bright ideas I’d love to hear them.

And then the other bad news (yeah, this third one even surprised me) is that I can’t quite open the door all the way because -- see that grey expanse to the left of it, there? That’s the leftover blueboard from when we built the hall it’s sitting in. It’s been leaning right there up against the wall since, hm, since not last Christmas but the Christmas before that…

Oh, and the final bad news is that the screw they gave me to put the handle on is too long but I didn’t realize it until it poked out the other side of the knob -- so now it looks like my laundry room has a tiny little boob.

Maybe I should get it a little prosthetic handle for the other side. A falsie, like. And then stick pink-ribbon magnets all over the washing machines …

Day 16: Accomplished (for real!)
Time: Oh my gosh I was so fired up I forgot to check. I think about 45 minutes.
Cost: Nothing.
Managing To Make Jokes About Domestic Violence And Breast Cancer In The Same Blog Post: Tasteless

1 comment:

Zuzoo said...

Never thought I'd hear anyone complain about too long of a screw

Sorry, could not resist...