It's not about the house.

Monday, December 3, 2007

Also: Armed Robbery Is Against the Law

I said I'd put up special funny this morning about all the helpful heating comments you were so kind as to leave, but I forgot I had to wake up before dawn and drive through a snowstorm to keep a date with a sadistic demon.

I have a dentist's appointment at 8:00.

I forgot this when I first promised the special funny. I remembered later, and thought I could get the funny done last night so all I'd have to do is post it in the morning. But yesterday sort of got away from me.

I only got about 2/3 of the Christmas decorations up. There's plastic on the windows, see, and this served to baffle and confuse me. I'm a same-thing-in-the-same-place-every-year girl, and when I couldn't put the choo-choo trains on the windowsill where they belong, I wound up holding each one in my hand for twenty minutes, turning in slow circles.

Plus, John Henry's still hammerin' -- in fact, just now I discovered that, if I'm not mistaken, he's managed to recruit a hammerin' fiend from around the corner. That was supposed to say "friend," but I'm leaving the typo because he is that, too.

So I haven't really spelt (supposed to be "slept," but I haven't really spelt, either, this is true), and I have to go straight to work from the torture chamber. I may get around to funnying tonight, but if I don't, I'll do it first thing tomorrow morning, I swear to god.*

Also, on Wednesday, I'm going to run my first official contest for a REAL PRIZE -- something other than a silly poem, that is. Something you can actually touch -- that is, if whoever wins it thinks I can be trusted with his or her mailing address.

So watch this space!

*PS Huh. I also forgot that there's a football game tonight. So let's make that officially, definitely, first thing tomorrow morning.


Leslie said...

If I had a haaaaam-mer, I'd hammer in the mor-or-nin' I'd hammer in the eeeeeeeeeve-nin' all over this laaa-and...
Sorry about the loud radiators.

jen said...

Is the prize pickled eggs? Cuz if it is? Im out.
If NOT well, then, hell, Im ALL IN!

Leslie said...

Ohhhhh but I'd get up at the buttcrack of dawn to be on time to enter if the prize was home-canned pickled beets and eggs!

OK, well, maybe not THAT early, but at least I would consider that a prize worth attempting to win.

EGE said...

Leslie, you are really just certifiably weird. You LIKE pickled beets & eggs but you DON'T like Peeps? Weird.

Hey, I sent you an email the other day trying to guess your sordid secret, but you never answered. Did it get bumped because I said sordid things?

(Now aren't the rest of YOU curious? Follow the link to Leslie's blog to read her sordid secret!)

EGE said...

Oh and PS Jen, no, that ain't the prize. I don't figure anyone would want to eat homemade canned goods sent to them from somebody they'd never even met.

Oh. Whoops.

Well, you're weird, too.

Leslie said...

You must have somehow filtered me out because I replied - I'll fwd the original reply right now this minute so look for it, mmmkay?